For anyone who spends any time with me, you already know how much I love quotes. If you don't spend time with me, what an unfortunately loss for you and, if you haven't already heard, I love to write down things that people say. That's why I love my crackberry. I have notes specifically for that purpose. People say the funniest things which are even funnier out of context. I love nothing more than re-reading my notes from the previous day. Soooo entertaining.
So, I decided to write them in a blog post. Completely out of context and completely anonymous. If you said it, you know who you are. If you were there, you know who said it. And if you don't fall into either category but know the people I hang out with, you can guess who said what. Actually, it would be pretty funny if people start guessing who said it....
"I've never before seen pants for 2 dollars...not even at the dollar store"
"I don't need you to buy me a drink...I'm not THAT thirsty"
person 1: They can't support their kids. Why are they even having sex?
person 2: Cuz they don't have cable.
"Guys are like dogs. They hump you, slobber all over the place, you have to feed them, clean up after them and take them out every so often. And after all that, they bark at you"
"I will cream your corn...baste your turkey...sauce your pasta...braise your breasts..sticky your buns"
"He's like an onion. There's so many layers. And when you cut him down the middle he makes you cry"
"you need to stand up for yourself cuz no one should put you 3rd. you should be first...or at least as close to first place as you can get"
"He wasn't repulsive from what I recall. Capital 'I', capital 'recall'."
person 1: it's my birthday!!!!
person 2: Happy birthday, pig humper
"The F train is sad. It's a sad train"
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